Aaron, Dr. Rice does NOT need a man...
Dear Aaron,
You know I have nothing but love for you. If I weren't besotted with another brilliant man, I'm sure we'd be very happy together. BUT, I've gotta speak up about this "Condoleezza Needs A Man" campaign you have launched via THE BOONDOCKS.
Condoleezza Rice does not need a man. If you think she's a heartless warmonger now, just wait until some fool with a Y chromosome decides to fvck with her. You know good and damn well that men just ain't no good. Them's dogs, scoundrels, cheaters, liars and worse. The moment Dr. Rice gets swept off her feet is the moment we should all pray never happens. A woman that accomplished can only be disappointed with the lesser male species. AND the closer you get to a man, the worse the disappointment is. She could get all gooey over some man promising to get the whole of Canada for her, only to get stuck with Quebec...which thinks itself an autonomous region anyway. She could fall madly in love with some slickster who speaks more languages than she knows. When it all hits the fan, as it always does with such opportunists...we will be faced with vengeance the world has not seen since The Flood. Hell hath no fury, nor doth God, like that of Condoleezza scorned.
Dr. Rice needs a hobby, not a man. Even some sort of on-demand physical "arrangement" with the qualified man of her choice but please don't get her someone to love in the human, irrational, out of control, illogical sense. Maybe she'd like polo. Or knitting. Or shooting. Get Wayne LaPierre to teach her the fun and excitement of huntin' shootin' and killin' like a real American. And while you're at it, sign yourself up to win Charlton Heston's "Cold Dead Hands" Rifle!
Grand Prize: Winchester®Model 1866 serial #36352, handcrafted in 1870. Valued at over $25,000, it's one of the finest firearms ever made.
First Prize: (2) Charlton Heston Commemorative Peacemakers. Includes Six Sterling Silver Cartridges and Handmade Presentation Case.
Whatever you do, please, please, please, PLEASE don't encourage anyone to pursue Dr. Rice for a loving relationship. It can only backfire and destroy our American Way of Life.
Your devoted reader,
The Socialista
xoxoxo
You know I have nothing but love for you. If I weren't besotted with another brilliant man, I'm sure we'd be very happy together. BUT, I've gotta speak up about this "Condoleezza Needs A Man" campaign you have launched via THE BOONDOCKS.
Condoleezza Rice does not need a man. If you think she's a heartless warmonger now, just wait until some fool with a Y chromosome decides to fvck with her. You know good and damn well that men just ain't no good. Them's dogs, scoundrels, cheaters, liars and worse. The moment Dr. Rice gets swept off her feet is the moment we should all pray never happens. A woman that accomplished can only be disappointed with the lesser male species. AND the closer you get to a man, the worse the disappointment is. She could get all gooey over some man promising to get the whole of Canada for her, only to get stuck with Quebec...which thinks itself an autonomous region anyway. She could fall madly in love with some slickster who speaks more languages than she knows. When it all hits the fan, as it always does with such opportunists...we will be faced with vengeance the world has not seen since The Flood. Hell hath no fury, nor doth God, like that of Condoleezza scorned.
Dr. Rice needs a hobby, not a man. Even some sort of on-demand physical "arrangement" with the qualified man of her choice but please don't get her someone to love in the human, irrational, out of control, illogical sense. Maybe she'd like polo. Or knitting. Or shooting. Get Wayne LaPierre to teach her the fun and excitement of huntin' shootin' and killin' like a real American. And while you're at it, sign yourself up to win Charlton Heston's "Cold Dead Hands" Rifle!
Grand Prize: Winchester®Model 1866 serial #36352, handcrafted in 1870. Valued at over $25,000, it's one of the finest firearms ever made.
First Prize: (2) Charlton Heston Commemorative Peacemakers. Includes Six Sterling Silver Cartridges and Handmade Presentation Case.
Whatever you do, please, please, please, PLEASE don't encourage anyone to pursue Dr. Rice for a loving relationship. It can only backfire and destroy our American Way of Life.
Your devoted reader,
The Socialista
xoxoxo
posted by Chicago Socialista | 7:55 AM
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